Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize