i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
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