I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
