I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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