That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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