so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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