I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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