drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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