I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
