your room smells of hookers.
And success
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
