He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize