How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
