whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Randomize
