i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
