I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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