so let's talk penis.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
