I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize