Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
