U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
It's rum buckets o'clock
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
