Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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