My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
