my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize