i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
So vagazzling was a success
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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