I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Randomize
