weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize