Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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