If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Randomize
