So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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