and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
