Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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