I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Where is the hickey?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
