I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
