sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
