Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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