My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
