Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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