your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
