dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize