Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
