Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
He? As in you personified your dick?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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