So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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