Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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