How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
