he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
