I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
