i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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