I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
