no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
