So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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