my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I have aggressive nipples.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
