I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
